Silver Lining
by autumn.in.mist
Summary: The Yondaime is dead, and Kakashi’s still in denial. [KakaRin]


Summary: Kakashi, Rin and a dead teacher. Unabashed fluffgst. First of the Cherry Blossom Epitaph semi-series (more like a collection of one-shots) KakaRin and AsuKure if you squint.

A/N: Can't believe I actually wrote a fic that has a semi-happy ending (if you can call it that). I just realised that Tsunade and Shizune shouldn't even be here, but it adds to the utter randomness of this, so… They may or may not have attended the Yondaime's funeral (does it ever say in canon if Tsunade has never gone back to Konoha since she left until Jiraiya and Naruto dragged her back? If it does, sorry for screwing up canon…). The first two scenes are the same, just from different points of view. That much should be obvious, but I'll say it anyways. Even though this is part of a series, it can stand on its own.

* * *

"Why are we doing this again?" Asuma says, peering out from behind the bushes that they're hiding behind.

"Because Gai dragged us here to spy on Kakashi and Rin," Kurenai replies. "And because Jiraiya-sama is a pervert and wants to 'observe' them so he can put them in one of his stupid hentai novels."

"They're not stupid!" Jiraiya protests - he might be upset over the death of his student, but he isn't going to let someone insult his Icha Icha Paradise books just because he feels like wallowing in self-pity. Tsunade hits him.

"And why did Gai drag us here to spy on the Ice Prince and Rin? Jiraiya I can understand, but why Gai?"

"You do remember that Rin likes Kakashi, don't you? And you know that Kakashi is Gai's Eternal Rival because of this because Gai likes her, right?"

"Point taken."

The group of shinobi clustered there are silent for a while, watching Rin cry and Kakashi look awkward.

"Why doesn't Gai-san want Kakashi-san to like Rin-nee-chan?" Iruka asks, breaking the silence.

"Eheheheh… Hey, wait, Kakashi doesn't like Rin, not in that way at least," Asuma answers.

"What way?"

Awkward silence.

"Anyways, why do you ask?"

"Because Kakashi-san wanted to buy a present for Rin and I helped him choose and when I asked why he was buying her a necklace he saidbecause he was her friend and he liked her."

"Why doesn't that sound like Kakashi?"

"Maybe he's just lovesick."

"There is so much that's just _wrong_ about that. Hatake Kakashi would never be lovesick. He's Kakashi! Kakashi does not get lovesick."

"Maybe he meant that he likes her as a friend."

"Still, that doesn't sound like Kakashi."

"Maybe he really does like her."

"That's a scary thought. And anyways, if he does anything to her, I will kill him."

"Why? Do you like her?" Kurenai asks, the jealousy in her voice fairly obvious.

"I think they're sweet," Shizune interrupts, starry-eyed.

"My Eternal Rival is stealing away - mmph!"

Shizune's glaring at Gai, a kind of freaky expression on her face, a huge change from her starry-eyed look from before. Demon eyes and a huge vein pulsing in her temple, she looks scary. Very scary. Tsunade-on-rampage scary. Anyone else would be running away. Very, very far away. But poor Gai doesn't seem to get it.

"Don't you dare interrupt them. Kakashi needs a break, and Rin's perfect for him. You stay right here and be quiet."

Gai ends up gagged and tied to a tree after proclaiming that he will never give up on Rin because she was pretty, graceful and everything Shizune, his teammate, was not.

"OWWW!" Jiraiya wails, having been accidentally elbowed by someone.

"Shut up baka," Tsunade snaps, thwacking Jiraiya on the head. "We don't want them to know we're here, remember?"

"But Anko elbowed me - OWWW!"

Imagine Inner Sakura. Then imagine Tsunade with the same look on her face as angry Inner Sakura.

Jiraiya lets out a muffled squeak and starts backing away from his old teammate.

"Eep!"

"Shut up, I want to hear!"

The group lapses into silence again.

* * *

The Yondaime is dead, and Kakashi's still in denial.

But it's carved in stone, and Rin's crying non-stop so he knows that the Yondaime isn't coming back. The Sharingan is crying too, but Kakashi isn't, because he doesn't want to admit it to himself, and no matter how much he's lightened up, Hatake Kakashi just does not cry.

He can hear Rin sobbing, and some kind of instinct kicks in and he doesn't know how, but he's holding her hand, even though it's just not like him to do that. But she's his friend, and he likes her, and not in a strictly platonic way either, though he'd never let anyone know that.

It's not love, not yet - his mind is still too fucked up to comprehend what love is, but he certainly likes her - a crush, though Kakashi doesn't even know what that word means. Sometimes this is just _wrong_ because they're almost like brother and sister, though they get along better, but it usually doesn't matter because siblings are supposed to fight, so they're not exactly _siblings_, but something else. Neither of them knows what to call this something else, but they aren't siblings.

She's smiling at him, but he can tell she doesn't really feel happy in the slightest, because her eyes are still watery and dull.

"Kakashi?" she asks, her voice so quiet that he can barely hear her.

"What?"

"Thanks. For well, you know, looking after me."

"It was payback. You took care of us, so I figured…"

"Well, thanks anyways."

He looks at the memorial, and without meaning to, he clenches his fists. His left fist anyways, since he's holding Rin's hand.

"Err… Sorry…"

"It's okay."

Both of them are silent, and looking at the stone, at the names of their deceased teammates.

Kakashi knows that his team is more than fallen apart now - broken, shattered, whatever you want to call it. The Yondaime and Obito were the 'life' of their team - the hyperactive, loud ones. Now only he and Rin are left, and both of them are quiet - they only speak when they have to.

He looks at Rin, tearing his gaze away from the memorial stone. She's still staring at the stone, hazel-green eyes shining with unshed tears. Kakashi knows what she's thinking about, because there's just no way it can be anything else.

Kakashi doesn't want to think about that though, because then he'll have to remember and he doesn't want to, doesn't want to think of them lifeless and just lying there.

Rin's crying again, and he looks away, not sure how to comfort her this time. But somehow she ends up with her face buried in his chest and he's got one arm wrapped around her. His shirt is tearstained and wet and she's shaking so hard she's making _him_ tremble as well. Neither of them makes any attempt to move though, and Kakashi realises for the first time how small Rin is compared to him - he's tall for his age, while Rin is what you can call petite. His face feels warm, and he realises that he's blushing underneath his mask. But he stays there, holding her in his arms.

It feels right, having her there for reasons that he can't explain, but it's enough, and the silence is no longer awkward, but almost comfortable.

* * *

Staring at the memorial stone, Rin can't quite believe that the Yondaime's name is up there. But it is and somehow, that makes it more real.

She's crying, even though she doesn't want to because she's a shinobi and shinobi don't cry and if the Yondaime was here he'd laugh at her and say something to make happier, but he isn't, and he never will be because he's _dead_.

Neither Kakashi nor her has said those words out loud - she thinks that maybe they're afraid to say it because they don't want to cement it in words. It's like if one of them says it, it'll be irreversible, and they can't pretend he isn't dead, that he's going to come back, that he can still eat ramen and smile that freaky grin of his and use a hairbrush as a microphone and just be there.

She feels something - or someone - take hold of her hand and looks up, seeing one black eye, a lopsided hitai-ite and a black mask and smiles slightly, the smile not quite reaching her eyes.

She rubs her eyes with her free hand. Her eyes are red and puffy, with huge bags under them. Her hair's messy and full of split ends. She doesn't care. She's locked herself inside her apartment - her family is dead, so she lives alone - for the past week, only eating when Kakashi forces her to.

It's almost funny in a way, the way that their roles have suddenly reversed in that week. Before his death, it'd been her that forced Kakashi to eat; it'd been her who took care of him. Now, she's the one who was spending all her time behind locked doors, not eating or sleeping, and Kakashi's the one taking care of her.

"Kakashi?"

"What?"

"Thanks. For well, you know, taking care of me."

"It was payback. You took care of us, so I figured…"

"Well, thanks anyways."

Kakashi nods slightly, and looks at the memorial, and tries to clench his fists in anger or sadness - Rin can't tell which.

Of course, he forgets he's still holding her hand, and as a result of that, ends up squeezing her hand instead of clenching his fists.

"Err… Sorry…"

"It's okay."

She knows she's lying, because it's _not_ okay and she still likes him, loves him, as much as a teenager can love, and the fact that he's apologising for holding her hand tells her he won't love him back. In a way, she feels like she's betraying Obito, because Obito loved her and he died for her, and she's still in love with Kakashi, but she can't really help it, and she just hopes that Obito'll forgive her.

Mentally, she whacks herself. The Yondaime, her teacher, is _dead_, and all she can think of is a stupid crush. A stupid _unrequited_ crush. And that makes her feel unbelievably selfish.

The silence between them is almost unbearable, stretching into infinity. But both of them are almost scared to break it, so they sit there, awkward and not speaking at all, just staring at the names on the stone - two in particular.

_Uchiha Obito._

Goggles and spiky black hair and a crush on her that she'd never be able to return. Fighting with Kakashi and in the process, setting Kakashi's shirt on fire and getting his butt used for target practice. She'll remember him as that forever, because she doesn't want to think of him with half his body crushed with rocks and his eyes glassy and lifeless and dead.

_Kazama Arashi._

An obsession with ramen and blue eyes and untameable blond hair and a weird smile. A happy-go-lucky attitude towards life, whacking Kakashi and Obito on their heads when they fought and insisting that ramen is the best food ever and that everyone should worship it (Rin almost laughs when she remembers this). She sees this in her mind, not the soulless, lifeless man with blood-streaked blond hair and blue eyes that are no longer warm but cold, open and unblinking.

She starts to cry again, making Kakashi look away, unsure what to do. In a few minutes, he's got one arm wrapped around her shaking figure and his shirt is wet with her tears but they don't move, because it just feels _right_, though neither of them can explain it. She's blushing furiously, but since her face is buried in his shirt, he can't see and she's glad of that.

Every cloud has a silver lining. Rin has never understood that before, but she thinks she knows what it means now. Out of bad things come good things, and Rin is sure this is a good thing.


End file.
